Yesterday P and I were reminiscing about our first few months as parents – let me tell you, we’ve come a long way! We can laugh about it now, but those first few months we took everyone’s advice seriously and wondered what we were doing wrong when said “advice” didn’t result in the promised outcome. Now that we’re more seasoned parents, we know better.
I try to always keep in mind those first few months when I talk with newer parents. I never want to make them feel like they’re “failing” at something because their precious peanut is 4 months old and still hasn’t rolled over yet, unlike all their friend’s children or is 6 months old and still isn’t sleeping through the night. Instead of giving advice I just try to listen to them and provide encouragement.
Part of the reason I started this blog was so I could accurately capture life with Monster as he grows and when in a few years time these early memories start to fade I can come back and re-read them. Figure it’ll help keep me honest in the future when I start to go gray and loose my memory. 😉
Anyway, what I am really trying to say is that I feel like I’ve been bragging a lot about Monster in my more recent posts. So I thought I’d share this
horrifying funny story with all of you. That way, in the future when you’re having one of those days when nothing seems to be going right, you can think back on this story and be glad that at least this didn’t happen to you.
A few days ago, I was changing Monster’s diaper. He almost never sits still during this process and is usually doing everything in his power to get free before a new diaper is put on. Sometimes I let him run around diaper-less for a few minutes, just because he enjoys it so much. On this particular day, Monster had already gone number 2 (he usually only does this once a day), so I thought it was safe to let him run around sans diaper for a little bit.
P always yells at me when he catches me doing this, promising that sooner or later Monster will poop on the floor. I always poo pooed (pun intended) his dire warnings.
Well, that day, P’s prediction finally came true.
Monster had been playing rather quietly in his room for a few minutes so I went in to check on him. Only to find several little piles of poop on the carpet. Ahh! P and I started to clean it up and Monster decided he wanted to help too. Luckily I got to him before he got to the poop, but it was close to nap time and he really didn’t like being told no. So we had a cranky baby to deal with in addition to a disgusting mess. We cleaned the mess up as best we could at the moment and put Monster down for a nap.
You would have thought I would have learned my lesson, right? Unfortunately, I’m a slow learner. The next night after I finished giving Monster his bath I let him run around with just a bath towel on. Just like the day before, he’d already gone number 2 earlier in the day, so I thought the chances of a reoccurrence of the previous day’s events were highly unlikely. Oh statistics, I know better than to apply you to an individual basis. But I threw caution (and statistics) to the wind. And got schooled. Boy, did I ever get schooled.
While Monster was busy playing with the Little Green Machine we borrowed to clean up the carpet from the day before’s accident, I was chatting with P about something. And then I began to smell that unmistakable odor. OH SH*T!!!
Luckily, the towel Monster was wearing caught most of the mess and only a little bit got on the carpet. However, it was smeared all over Monster’s back, so he unfortunately had to go back in the bathtub. He was not happy about that situation.
Suffice it to say, it’ll be quite some time before I let Monster run around again without a diaper on.
Aren’t you glad you’re not me? Hopefully I made your day a little brighter.
Now let’s never speak of this again.